Bitch Resting Face

When a woman's default, or neutral, facial expression is rather bitchy and mean looking in nature. She can be happy, nice and even in a great mood, but she'll still have that look. They can't help it. People would usually think that women with the BRF syndrome hate them or something, even though they don't. So don't ever think that - 99% of them may love you even.

 Kadang kalau aku lagi berpikir atau bahkan completely thinks of nothing, ibuku bakal ngeliatin aku dan bilang, "Dek, kamu kesel?"

"Nggak," adalah jawaban standarku.

"Mukamu kayak gitu."

"IT'S JUST MY FACE."

I'm sure I'm not alone on this one. Sebagai seseorang yang naturally have a jutek face, aku sering dianggap sombong (yang diperparah keenggananku bergaul dengan manusia - I prefer ducks) dan mudah kesal (which is true...). Truth is, 8/10 circumstances happen itu sebenarnya cuma kesalahpahaman karena aku... well... I've got a bitch resting face.

And what is a bitch resting face, it's basically ketika ekspresi wajahmu netral dan orang-orang berasumsi kamu lagi kesal. Like, no. It's just my face. And then they insist that, no, it's not your face. And I'm like OKAY WHO DO YOU THINK I AM, KOH THE FACE STEALER?

Anyway.

Biasanya aku gak apa-apa kalau orang bertanya sekali... dua kali... terutama karena aku tau my bitch resting face is... well... bitchy alright. It's no surprise kalau orang-orang mengira aku lagi kesal atau lagi merencakan a massive murder in my head (which is funny - kalau aku merencanakan pembunuhan massal mukaku pasti terbelah oleh seringai lebar, bukannya expressionless bored face). Tapi kalau orang bertanya BERKALI-KALI dan kemudian merasa yakin bahwa I made that face karena aku lagi kesal, well, YES, NOW I'M ANNOYED. Like, I can go from happy bitch resting face to I'm going to murder you quick af (which means as fuck, to those of you who don't know). Apalagi kalau aku udah pernah menjelaskan hal ini padamu. It seems to me the thought never settled down in your mind. Kalau aku merasa kesal, my brows will FURROW. Aku bakal melihatmu seolah I've seen BETTER CREATURE. Truth is, learn the difference between my neutral expression and my irritated expression. The difference is big.

It's okay if you're curious. It's even better you ask your assumptions. It's not okay when you insist that the frown on my face is not my face. If you see me with the bitch resting face and ask me if I'm okay to which I reply I am, leave the fucking topic. Don't continue with, "I thought you ... because you ..." unless I ask you why. Don't. If I have something troubling me I will come to you regardless. I don't need any fucker to make me annoyed by asking whether or not I am annoyed BASED ON MY FACE.

Sometimes I'm just too tired to make any expressions, human.